Breaking Up is Hard to Do, But It’s Not ME, It’s TOTALLY You!

Sometimes in life you have to make the tough decision to walk away from toxic relationships. In our technological age, this doesn’t just apply to the human-to-human type of relationships but also to the human-to-social network type of relationships.

As some of you may know, I’m always on the lookout for a network or platform where I can find an audience for my work. I hadn’t been too happy with using online stores that charge a lot of fees on top of the Paypal fees when making sales for a small handmade business. Facebook also wasn’t the best choice because of the view limits that are imposed on public pages. I’ve tried several platforms but recently decided that two monetized platforms were just eating my time and creativity without providing much in return in the way of sales or growth for my business. This breakup letter is about them, although they shall both remain nameless since I see no need to give them any more publicity or link love.

Dear Social Networks,

I remember when we met so well. I was an original content creator full of ideas and humor and creativity, and I saw in you the perfect escape from a platform which hid my qualities from those that cared for me. You offered a place where I could still own my content, and where my talents would be exposed to new audiences along with a tiny monetary incentive just for doing so. My friend and I quickly joined up (she brought me to one and I brought her to the other). I even invited more friends along. How full of mirth and possibilities we were! We met new people who liked our work and people whose work we liked as well! It was definitely a lustful honeymoon period. Unfortunately, it did not last long at all.

Social Network Number 1 – Oh the features you had. Glorious and many although a bit confusing to new users who may have found it overwhelming. When I created a private group to try and help my friends along and to get to know you better, your admin barged right into the group to start answering questions even though you had never been invited as a member of the group. That was the first sign of problems between us. Boundaries, people. They are important! When I explained to you how some of your post reactions were being seen as very negative to new users, you argued with me, even though I was trying to help and make it a better experience for all. Your low traffic site was overrun with robots that all the real users could clearly see and recognize, but you must have thought we were not intelligent enough to notice. You confused me with my dear friend. Big mistake. How can a relationship last when you can’t even tell the difference between your users who surely have different IP addresses, being in separate countries? It wasn’t bad enough that you couldn’t tell us apart, but then you treated her badly by hanging on to her money for far too long when she made a sale on your site and proceeded to make public the conversations you had with her in a group because you still couldn’t tell us apart. Obviously, I chose my friend over you because you would have treated me the same way. And so we had to part ways. It’s sad that I had so much hope for you and would have been willing to bring more people to you if you had treated me right. But I can only base my decisions on what I see and learn. I’m a woman who knows I can’t marry you and then change you. I’m just glad we did not bring many children (people I invited to the site) into the equation.

Admins randomly downvote member's posts - because "the world isn't perfect and so we shouldn't try to be," or "because I was in a bad mood and it releases stress?" - wtf?

Admins randomly downvote member’s posts – because “the world isn’t perfect and so we shouldn’t try to be,” or “because I was in a bad mood and it releases stress?” – wtf?

hmmm - different users but with the same profile pic - one is just cropped smaller.

hmmm – different users but with the same profile pic – one is just cropped smaller.

Out of context comments that have nothing to do with posts or other comments appear randomly generated and the same phrases used by many accounts.

Out of context comments that have nothing to do with posts or other comments appear randomly generated and the same phrases used by many accounts.

Social Network Number 2 – It wasn’t long before I noticed that while you continued to say you cared for me and valued me that you only introduced everyone to your sexy model friends while I stood by in the background. You also didn’t seem to know how to keep a professional distance from most people although you did with me. Maybe a little too distant. I guess that should have told me something. You made preferential distinctions between my friends and also between my friends and myself. It was so cute how you’d verify them but then tell me I needed to meet so many qualifications and be verified elsewhere for you to do the same for me (seriously, NO, it WASN’T at all cute – 5 out of the 6 people you verified had no more qualifications or verification than I did when I last checked, or did you think none of us could actually check on other platforms?  You’re so funny.  And by “funny,” I mean “not”).  Then I noticed you only had dialog with certain ones of your friends and only promoted certain ones. Many of the people you promoted didn’t really offer much in the way of content. Some only knew how to curate links that could easily be found by using a Google search, even though you talked as though Google owed us all something for our content too. Interesting. Many times over I’ve seen evidence of favoritism that you’ve denied despite the fact that I have screen shots and proof. It was so endearing that you claimed to roll out groups in the order they were applied for (seriously, NO, it WASN’T at all endearing when I have proof of the order they were applied for and in which they were approved).  I also am left wondering how much all my unpaid work in beta groups made for charity (all ad revenue went to a charity for over two months) and that was never disclosed to us.  That type of lipstick on your collar made me make up my mind long ago to leave you. And if I hadn’t had children to care for, I would have left immediately. Your complete disdain from communication has been a problem from the start and I’m not the first of your members to mention it.  It always seems to be a case of just “a little too little and a little too late” from you when it comes to sharing info that might have saved a relationship.  Somehow you create your own problems because of it, despite having the clear means, tools, and ability to communicate effectively. So I’m leaving you too.

How is it possible to have more likes (hearts) than views (eyes)? Surely a persona would have to view it in order to have actually clicked the like button? I have so many examples of this happening and never a good explanation.

How is it possible to have more likes (hearts) than views (eyes)? Surely a person would have to view it in order to have actually clicked the like button? I have so many examples of this happening and never a good explanation.

Sometimes your views just disappear altogether, even when in reality there were over 400. Doesn't inspire a lot of faith on a monetized platform.

Sometimes your views just disappear altogether, even when in reality there may have been over 400. Doesn’t inspire a lot of faith on a monetized platform.

It's not just me.

It’s not just me.

Some verified accounts direct others to unshare/unfriend/unfollow other accounts and only follow and friend their own friends. This creates division and seems like a scheme to monopolize the ad revenue generated on the platform to their own family trees. It's not the first time I saw it and it happens to a whole list of users, some of whom had no interaction at all with the ones directing the unfollows. Management is aware of it, but it continues.

Some verified accounts direct others to unshare/unfriend/unfollow other accounts and only follow and friend their own friends. Seems like a scheme to monopolize the ad revenue generated on the platform to their own family trees, something the TOS used to spell out was unacceptable. It’s not the first time I saw it and it happens to a whole list of users. Management is aware of it, but it continues.  Could really hamper having your brand seen.

I can only blame myself for being hopeful and wasting more of my time and gifts than I should have on either of you. Otherwise, I was honest and as respectful and patient as any woman could be when they feel passed over. So yeah, we’re breaking up, but it’s totally on you.

P.S. I think Myspace has the last laugh.

tsuversusmyspace

Data from May 10, 2016

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8 comments for “Breaking Up is Hard to Do, But It’s Not ME, It’s TOTALLY You!

  1. February 27, 2016 at 8:02 pm

    I haven’t been on Sqeeqee(1) or TSU(2)hardly at all lately. Yes I know that’s who you’re talking about. 😉
    I’ve been meaning to delete my accounts for awhile now, but just keep procrastinating.
    Wasted a lot of time on them for nothing.

    Sqeeqee is terrible. Too much going on there, and I meant the features, not the content.
    When I mentioned that my Mom passed away and saw that somebody commented with, “Love it!” that this site is full of fake people who don’t care about the content and are only concerned with making that fraction of a penny to be added to their balance of just under a whole $1 for months of work.

    TSU is nothing but bullshit also. I’ve never thought that favoritism was possible on a social network, but it sure does on TSU. I had over 1.5K followers and my posts weren’t even showing any traffic. A few times I noticed that traffic was at zero when checking the stats of my posts. it was fishy to me so I ended up just not using the site for anything except linking to my own monetized site and videos on YouTube. Ironically I made more from the traffic coming from TSU from my AdSense and Youtube ads than I did from the actual TSU site. And even those posts show no traffic even though people are clicking the links to get to my blog or youtube videos. NAAAhhh, not fish at all huh?

    I think from now on I’ll stay away from Social networks that promise to pay you to post stuff, because those sites are full of phony users and the content is either stolen content or just boring. I mean, how many picture can one want to see of a phucking army man, or a kaleidoscope type image of a flower?

    • February 27, 2016 at 11:29 pm

      That’s exactly how I’m feeling. I think these sites have ruined monetized sites for me. I hope one will come along that gets it right but I’m fine staying away from all that ugliness for now.

  2. February 27, 2016 at 10:21 pm

    Just deleted TSU account. Wooohoo!
    Keeping the Sqeeqee one just for link whoring to my site though.

  3. February 29, 2016 at 11:33 am

    So are you deleting your account on tsu? I hated squeeqee, it was way too confusing and I didn’t like the negativity. I know tsu has issues but I see improvement and I enjoy the social activities. I can see it as no more than a social site but will use it to introduce what I do for business to see how well networking goes. I held off going full boar with my work simply because I wanted people to get to know me first. This allows me time to work on my website and I can link to it once I have it up and going. I don’t have expectations that the Site, or any Site, will make me rich and famous, I just want people to know what I do and enjoy. If I make a profit that’s good but I don’t do what I do just for profit. I enjoy our banter and will miss you if you leave. I would like to know where you are going and I hope we keep in touch. Good friends are hard to come by and I like to consider you a good friend. Hugs

    • February 29, 2016 at 11:59 am

      I’ll still be on facebook, twitter, and my own site right here! And I’m linked to your site so I won’t lose you. I’m glad you are seeing some improvement on tsu – just because it doesn’t work for me does not mean it won’t work for someone else. But putting in months of working groups and providing content for free (all revenue went to charity) with little to no return just doesn’t make sense to me and would burn me out. I never joined for the ad revenue, but for my own small business so the ad revenue was just a perk. I never expected to get rich or famous on any site either. But after over a year and only 3 sales, one of which will never be paid for because I’ll never reach the high cash out, I figure that just isn’t smart business sense and is too much of my time and effort especially with my dad’s failing health. There are other things too – the division, having someone telling others to unfollow/block or unshare my posts, etc. I could go on but I’ve wasted too much time on it already. 😉 My profile remains there until I decide what to do with the tiny bit left in my bank.

      • March 1, 2016 at 9:51 am

        I totally understand. I haven’t tried selling on there and don’t really plan to but I have had a few request sales that surprised me. At this point, Tsu is the lesser of all the evils out there for me. I need a place to play and have fun and feel appreciated for who I am. Tsu has done that for me. I didn’t encounter the crap you did so I’m sure I would feel totally different if I did. I avoid the jerks, if you know what I mean. I wish I could say something comforting to you as you deal with your dad’s health issues. It is the worse to see a parent suffer in any way. I do wish you have peaceful moments. Message me any time on Facebook. I’m am still going to be there and have plans to renew my Dollyknickers page as soon as I have my website ready. It is hard work to do a website!! Geez!!! LOL I will link to you on it as well as soon as I learn how!! Hahahaha Big hugs and much love.

        • March 1, 2016 at 10:24 am

          I don’t use Etsy or other online stores at the moment. I only use my own site really and FB was limiting views so that is the only reason I have looked at other networks for my brand. I avoided the jerks there too but it seems because my name was included on a list, it did not stop people from actively shunning me – so childish and divisive. I’m glad it didn’t happen to you and I hope it never does. Thanks so much for the kind words – I will still be on Facebook and Twitter and my own site as well. Big hugs and love right back at you! xoxo